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I'm an avid Facebook user. In fact, we just got a new cover on our Facebook page.
You can also subscribe to my Facebook updates here. If you 'Like' our Facebook page or subscribe to our eNewsletter by October 15th, you may win the world's most sold oral sex toy the Sqweel 2. Because it's Orgasm October.
So for the meat of this article. Sexual trauma and forgiveness. How important is it and why is it important, anyway? This status update really triggered me to think about my journey to forgiveness from a different perspective. I've watched movies about forgiveness, talked to a therapist extensively on the subject and read a wide variety of books dealing with rape and PTSD. Did you know that PTSD and rape survivors have very similar flashbacks? Yeah.
So here's the status update:
Can I forgive?
I've never forgiven my rapist completely. However this doesn't mean I can't live my life and continue to have amazing sex or an amazing love life. I argue that for the sake of the survivor, forgiveness is actually essential. Now, whether you're talking about forgiveness for the rapist or yourself is another question.
The bigger question: can I forgive me?There are so many reasons I won't be able to forgive my rapist. More importantly, can I forgive myself for being foolish enough to put myself in said dating situation where I got raped?
Forgiveness to love
I'm not saying you should immediately fall in love or have sex after talking about your trauma with your therapist. But you shouldn't continue to feel ashamed about being violated. And for me at least, foregiveness was one way to feeling more sexually and emotionally stronger.
For my sake and for the sake of those I love, I deserve beauty. You deserve love and beauty, too. We've received several private comments noting some of our readers are dealing with sexual trauma (like assault, abuse). We'll talk more soon about recovering from sexual trauma, assault and abuse.
For now, consider positivity, optimism and tread very lightly on your sexuality. It's totally normal to not feel very sexual, and it's highly recommended to visit a counselor. At GetLusty for Couples, we hope to write extensively on support in recovering from sexual trauma.
Hopefully then we can start to forgive. Others and/or ourselves.
This is post by Erica Grigg, our Founder and Chief Lust Officer. She's a writer, marketer, social entrepreneur and sex geek. She wants to end boring sex. If you don't see Erica riding around downtown Chicago in her beach cruiser or at a diner with her adoring husband, you see her chatting up the tech community about the importance of sex and love in marriage. Follow Erica on Twitter @ericagrigg or subscribe via Facebook and Google+. Want to connect about business partnership with a woman-run business that cares? E-mail me directly at erica@getlusty.com.
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